Apologies That Make Women Forgive (Almost) Instantly!

29 Oct

Greetings beautiful people!

One of the most painful aspects of dating involves any type of disagreement; the most painful, of course, being a breakup. But then experience also tells me that reconciliations after a disagreement are one of sweetest moments ever – if the parties handle it properly.  I can still vividly recall a big fight I had with my now ex Fred.   He had the temerity to react, rather positively I thought, to the advances of another female at a party we attended together; in my presence – he must be nuts!  When confronted about it he said that he was just being his friendly self and that I had nothing to worry about.  He waited till I had calmed down sufficiently and then walked up with a huge bouquet, a handmade apology card, and a big smile.  Who can resist that?

Women aren’t as complicated as you may think. You do something wrong, she gets upset, and then you apologize. That’s basically it.

I don’t see why men make a fuss over women making a fuss about what they did wrong. And when men do apologize, when it doesn’t work it’s because it is not convincing enough.

Don’t raise an eyebrow at me gents, all the ladies are nodding their heads on this one. Men think that simply blurting out ‘I’m sorry’ is apology enough. Well, trust me; that will only do if your offense was just bump her at the door on your way out or accidentally elbow her at the Starbucks line.

Apologies that work

Sweetheart, that is not enough. Let me teach you the right way to apologize to a woman:

Remember the three components essential to an apology: “I’m sorry”, “I won’t do it again”, and “What can I do to make up for it?” The first part says that you’re actually remorseful for what you’ve done, the second part is a promise that you are remorseful enough not to do it again, and the last one is to correct the damage or at least lessen it.

Put a little effort in it. Saying sorry is never enough. Be a little creative about it. Do something nice, fun, or romantic enough to equal, or better yet exceed, the gravity of the offense you’ve committed. Flowers are always welcome, a personalized dinner date, or a surprise whatever would also make the cut. I’ve said this again and again and I won’t stop saying it: gentlemen, women love effort; we know how to appreciate even the littlest bit of effort and it would be even more special if it comes with an apology.

Give it when she’s likely to forgive you. It is not such a good idea to apologize when she’s at the height of her anger. She would just think you’re saying ‘sorry’ for the mere sake of saying sorry and in a bad attempt to make her feel better. Do it when she’s calmed down and not hysterical. Otherwise, your perfect apology will just go to waste. On the other hand, don’t wait too long planning and carrying out your apology; or else you’ll be sending the wrong message that you had to think about whether to apologize or not, plus you’re likely to lose momentum. Remember: timing, timing, timing!

Make it public or do something that she would never forget and smile about when she’s reminded of it. Posting “I am sorry” on her Facebook wall does not, unfortunately, count. So think harder. It could be a big sorry sign on her street, or hiring a bunch of kids to hand her post-it’s, or anything that resembles a Hollywood romantic comedy scene. Getting other people involved would make it seem so grand; subjecting yourself to humiliation (i.e. spelling ‘Sorry’ with your butt) would make her feel like you’re willing forget your pride just to make her smile and forgive you. (Dangerous, life threatening, or blackmailing schemes don’t count and are in fact disgusting), Remember the art of getting a girl to fall in love with you!

And, possibly, the best way to apologize – movie effects aside – is to be sincere and show her that.

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